"A Certified Letter" is your first
and, so far, only book and you're already over forty. How did you come to be a writer?
I'm by no means a professional writer. I
worked on this book for 7 years with long intervals writing occassionally in my scarce
free time (I have an absorbing job and a family to take care of). I've written "A Certified Letter"solely out of my heart's need as a form of
psychotherapy. I also wanted to share with readers my deepest experiences
connected with most important human issues like erotic love, attitude to death, search for
the transcendence.
Does your book contain autobiographical
elements?
To great extent - yes, though of course it
doesn't resemble a conventional autobiography. The whole idea centres around a blind platonic obsession of a young protagonist
with a fellow student. However, it's written from over ten years' perspective and relates,
in a deliberately self-indulgent way, the lyrical subject's coming to terms with what
was considered a great failure, almost a tragedy. I can say that this was taken from my
real experience. I wanted to show how I dealt with this problem - how I "cleared my
accounts" with life so, in this respect, my work can truly be called "a
testimony". However, I deliberately sharpened the lyrical subject's emotional
construction so that it can't be treated as my exact psychological portrait.
Is "D" a real person? What
about the strange city you describe?
Yes, he is. His name even starts with
"D". I believe he lives somewhere in Poland with his family. Since the times of
our student days I have never met him again.
I may seem a bit obsessed with the city I live
in but it's really a magical place though, in some aspects, an ugly duckling (see the
section Lodz - an unusual city). It plays a very important role in my work - of a
silent witness and decor for the main protagonist's numerous sufferings and
fantasies.
What is your primary message for the
readers?
In short, my aim was to show how a defeated,
depressed person attempts to "mend" their life. It involves also dealing with
the protagonist's marriage, parents, fears, memories of the past, dreams, fantasies. The
epilogue clearly shows the direction of change - a way for liberation from pain,
obsessions, sense of absurd, which is in the arms of the Creator. At the very end of the
"A Certified Letter" the intensive need and yearning of the lyrical
subject is met by entering into a close relationship with God.
Can you explain the book's title?
A certified letter is guaranteed by the postal
service to be delivered to the recipient. If you read carefully you will encounter this
phrase twice in the book - in the beginning and close to the end. It's a sort of symbolic
clasp uniting the setting off and finishing of the main character's inner journey.
First, it's used just as a demand for someone to react to the hero's desperate message;
finally it's the confirmation of finding the answer.
Why haven't you defined the gender of your
characters?
It's true - in the whole book I've never
mentioned their gender and even didn't name the sender of the letter. They could be of any
sex. I felt this would make the story more universal, more symbolic. I thought a bit about
reviving the medieval Everyman. I didn't disclose my own sex immediately and published the
story under my maiden name - I.Kubat, to make it even more mysterious. I also wanted to
play with the gender of the protagonists - I'm fascinated by the way female and male
features may mix in a person. In a way I desired to create a sort of an androgynous
figure, which embodies the characteristics of both sexes and can be
wholly representative of humanity. Also, I'm just enchanted by the way the God of the
Bible combines the masculine and feminine lineaments and I wanted to somehow hint at this
fullness.
Your work isn't a conventional novel. What
is it's genre?
Yes, it lacks the conventional novel's typical
characteristics like the plot, dialogues, lots of characterization, etc. It was written as
a letter so it might fall under the epistolary though I would rather call it a testimony
or an eclectic poetic narrative. It has almost no plot, it's rather a spiritual journey, a
sort of memoir built of loose thoughts and stream of consciousness. It has some typical
narrative elements but they're short (e.g. I intentionally used only one dialogue in the
whole book) and serve only as a background for psychological/philosophical
divagations. In the story I enclosed several poems, which, I believe, enhanced the
pulsating, emotional climate of my work. I feel that this a bit chaotic or even imperfect
form helps my story to retain its features as an authentic and dynamic letter.
You are Polish. Why did you write in
English?
It's explained
why the letter has been written in English early in the story - the lyrical
subject wanted to feel closer to the addresee of the letter (In Poland the command of
English is rare in the generation of today's 40 year olds). Quite practically - what I
wrote is so very intimate, has many autobiographical elements and some people could
recognize themselves so I'd rather not publish my book in Poland yet. The more romantic
reason is that I love the English language - its melody fascinates me. It also gave
me the unique opportunity to disguise the gender of my characters (in Polish it's very
difficult if not impossible in the long run).
What kind of readers do you think your
work is targeted at?
Mostly people
experiencing the middle age crisis, it could also interest serious young adults
seeking the meaning of life and any readers
who experienced similar problems as described in my work (apart from
unhappy affection and looking for transcendence I also focus on loneliness in a
marriage, hypochondria and death of a parent).
What were your most important literary
influences?
Chronologically speaking: "Winnie the
Pooh", French existentialists, romantic English poets, John Donne, Emily Bronte,
Graham Greene, Samuel Beckett, Iris Murdoch, T.S.Eliot, Sylvia Plath, David Lodge
(especially "Theraphy"), the Bible.